Archive for April, 2010

Worst Best Man Speech of All-Time

Posted in Other on April 30, 2010 by EAST SIDE RYNO

I have never seen someone more unprepared in my entire life. I mean, this dude probably had a good year to come up with a best man speech. What does he do? Sits on his ass for the whole time and tries to wing it. The definition of a loser. And then he has the audacity to tell everyone that he’s “not big on speeches.” Tough shit! You’re the best man. All you need is give a good three minute speech about your best friend. Who cares what you talk about? For all I care, talk about him taking a huge sh*t in public. Doesn’t matter. Just get the job done.

Rube Baker All Over Again

Posted in Other on April 28, 2010 by EAST SIDE RYNO

Roethlisberger Deserves This…

Posted in Other on April 26, 2010 by EAST SIDE RYNO

Ever since Roethlisberger broke into the NFL, I  have never liked him. I didn’t know why. I just didn’t like the dude. As a matter of fact, I hated him. He looked like a a total doucher. Last summer, when I found out he raped a chick in a hotel room, I knew I was right about him. He’s a creeper, an asshole, and an overall really sh*tty person. Last month, news broke that he actually assaulted a college girl in Georgia and has seemingly paid her a ton of money to keep her mouth shut. Now he comes out today with a bullsh*t letter of apology. Six games isn’t a good enough suspension. Suspend him for ten f*ckn years. Since when does Goodell allow rapists to play in the NFL? Vick gets a two year suspension for having dog fights, but Big Ben only gets six games for assaulting a HUMAN BEING??? C’mon! Not sayin’ that the NFL is racist, but this isn’t looking fair to me.

A Fireable Offense

Posted in Yankees on April 26, 2010 by EAST SIDE RYNO

It’s now official. The only two people who can stop the Yanks from winning every series are Javier Vazquez and Joe Girardi. Javy is giving up hits like its his job and I’ve never seen a more poorly managed baseball club since Grady Little back in ’03. I’ve seen managers make bad decisions, but I’ve never seen a manager so indecisive before in my life!  Let me take you through what happened yesterday.

With the Yankees down 5-4 in the 7th inning, Angels’ slugger Kendry Morales stepped up to the plate with runners on 1st and 2nd with two outs. Girardi called for an intentional walk to load the bases. After the first ball, Girardi all of a sudden changed his mind and wanted Marte to throw to Morales.  Marte’s next two pitches were out of the strike zone, having the count go to 3-0. Marte then proceeded to look into the dugout to see if Girardi wanted to change his mind. He didn’t. Morales hit the next pitch over the fence to seal the win.

With the talent this team has, Girardi can do absolutely nothing and probably win 90+ games. But if he continues to pull this indecisive bullsh*t, fire him. Maybe just demote him back to bench coach and hire Donnie Baseball or something.

Who the F*ck is Dallas Braden??

Posted in Yankees on April 23, 2010 by EAST SIDE RYNO

And that’s exactly what A-Rod is thinking here. Listen dude, A-Rod can walk over “your” mound whenever he wants. You know why? He’s f*ck’n A-Rod and you’re a clown. If Tim Lincecum or Roy Halladay were pitching, A-Rod wouldn’t walk on their mounds because they have respectable names. Dallas Braden isn’t exactly a household name.  I love A-Rod’s reaction to this insignificant d-bag.  “He just told me to get off his mound. I was a little surprised. I’d never quite heard that. Especially from a guy that has a handful of wins in his career … I thought it was pretty funny actually.” Love it. No one should be allowed to talk sh*t to the Yanks until they actually lose a series this season.


Posted in Giants on April 22, 2010 by EAST SIDE RYNO

Quite possibly the worst draft coverage of all time. One of the reasons I love to watch the draft is the anticipation of Roger Goodell’s announcement of each pick. Instead of waiting for Goodell at the podium, ESPN decided to tell us by showing each player on the phone celebrating a minute beforehand!!!! What a let down! I can count a dozen of 1st round picks where I was anticipating Goodell’s announcement. I would think to myself, “Who’s next?!?!” Then ESPN would show the next pick being congratulated by his family before the announcement, causing all of my anticipation would disappear. Awesome way to keep the fans on their feet ESPN!!! F*ckn douchebags.

Plus how much of a gay is Tim Tebow?! Anyone who self-proclaims their hard work is an absolute peace of sh*t. “One of the reasons the Broncos chose me is because of my hard work and dedication.” Bahahahahaha! Use that hard work and dedication against any linebacker in this league and you’ll be crying your ass back to the Philippines helping kids read and sh*t.

On a happier note, I like Jason Pierre-Paul. I was totally pissed when the Raiders selected Rolando McClain 8th overall and the Bills selected Spiller with the 9th pick, but Pierre-Paul is a solid draft choice. This pretty much guarantees that Osi is out the door, and if you’ve read my previous blogs, you would know that I’m completely ok with that. If Pierre-Paul is the real deal, our D-line will be back in form…if Tuck stays healthy. Plus the dude is an absolute freak when it comes to doing flips. I would love to see this guy pull a Joe Thiesman on Romo or the new  NFC East p*ssy quarterback Kevin Kolb.

Only at Rose Hill

Posted in Other on April 22, 2010 by EAST SIDE RYNO

Probably the first time Fordham has ever been on Sportscenter. Since it took place at FU (alma mater of Bellarmine and Denzel Washington) , this is definitely blog worthy.

Lawrence Frank is Officially Baller

Posted in Other on April 21, 2010 by EAST SIDE RYNO

Wow! Another guy who doesn’t give a f*ck when the camera’s rolling. Love it!!!

Wasted Dude Struggles With Flip Flops

Posted in Other on April 21, 2010 by EAST SIDE RYNO

I absolutely love this. You can see how hard he’s trying to get that flip flop back on his feet. And once you think he’s got it? He looses it again. The best part is at 0:24 when the guy in shorts tries to help him out by kicking the flip flop closer to his hands. I can watch this for hours.

Jo Just Speaking His Mind…

Posted in Misc. on April 21, 2010 by EAST SIDE RYNO

Joakim Noah on (city of) Cleveland: “There is nothing going on. It’s bad, man…Cleveland really sucks.”

Nothin’ like a dude who has no filter in press conferences. Hey, if they guy wants to talk sh*t about Cleveland, let him. Face it, Jo grew up in the greatest city in the world and attended the greatest high school of all time. No wonder he thinks Cleveland sucks. It’s funny that these comments have done nothing to do with the Bulls’ series against the Cavs. This is just Joakim speaking his mind. He’s not trying to spark a rivalry with the Cavs or even get LeBron pissed off (which he has done many times on the court). He just wants people to know that he doesn’t like the city of Cleveland. And to be honest, the guy has a point. Jacobs Field is alright and the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is pretty sweet. But what else is there?